nightlights

a smooth Scotch is oiling my throat, as night breaks over Amman and the cold seeps into my fingertips - as much as our days make one think a warm spring has begun, it is still February and it does get rather cold at night. This year Winter seems to have passed Jordan by - well, till now at least. It went from a dry, cold autumn to a dry, warm spring... without rain, without snow. The dams are less than quarter full, the ground is dry and the time span during which water comes through the urban supply pipes (which already is only on one day per week) is getting shorter. If spring does jump the queue and kills a nascent winter, then the summer will be disastrous.

No good news for a fresh graduate of water management. Well - or maybe it is? It certainly provides stimulus for action and awareness among the population. I have decided to stay in the Middle East indefinitely for the time being. Maybe in Jordan. There is a lot to do here and a lot is happening. A growing number of people are beginning to care about green ideas and sustainability - the areas that I want to work in / live for.
Though it seems in many cases that the motivation for caring about green/sustainable concepts is only related to financial benefits or image and customer perception, it's better than not caring about our planet at all, which is of course the norm. I've started to become so aware of ideas of sustainability and ecological footprint, that I sometimes look out of the window in a taxi and think at the sight of a house: wow - we're leaving such a HUGE imprint on this planet - each house is making it bigger (and people here, it seems, love building their own houses!) and harder to remove.

I have a vision, where we return again to living in harmony with nature, where the whole physical element of our existence changes entirely, to fit in with the natural elements around us, where our numbers on this planet are again reduced to a sustainable level, where we leave behind materialism and rationally decide to abandon the spoils of what we now call "civilisation" and technological advancement, while taking the wisdom we have gained from that experience (if any) with us, to return to mother Earth, respect her ways, cherish her fruit - our lifeline - and discover ourselves.

But where does unnecessary technology begin and where do necessary tools for survival end?
And what is a sustainable population size for planet Earth?
More importantly, maybe we need to ask where the motivation for a return to nature should come from, why people should think this is of any importance. With all the million things that distract us from looking into ourselves for just a minute, for appreciating the kindness of a tree or the sound of a butterfly and from just being in the moment here and now - with the wheel of work-consume-borrow money-consume more-work more-pay off debts-etc. turning ever faster and with the whole world telling us that all we really want is to have a big house, a nice car, two kids and a husband/wife with a toothpaste-ad smile and that there's value in owning the latest ANYTHING... and most importantly: with massive and powerful business interests vested in us thinking in such a way and happily consuming... how can be break through this cycle of blur, of bla, of blubber? It's so distracting, placing walls between people, it's indoctrination and blatant brainwashing. We're slaves and believe ourselves free. We've imprisoned ourselves and don't see the bars.
And all is about money - money is supposed to set you free!! I have money and certainly I can travel, buy anything I like and so on - but that is not freedom. It's only more distraction, more blur in my vision and more weight in my wake. The idea of freedom (by which I mean freedom of the chains we have put on ourselves - societal, religious, financial etc. - reducing our actions and thinking to a constant concern about our impression on others) is so immense that I cannot even perceive it in my mind - I sometimes believe to perceive the edges of freedom, the silhouette of it or its shadow in the dark, but I know that I am too scared, too conservative and too caught up in the status quo to really face its immenseness.

Well, well... it's so easy to write. Let's do something. Any suggestions?